I recently read Think Again by psychologist Adam Grant, and it gave me a lot to, well… rethink. The book was engaging and insightful, and as someone who works to help others flourish, I found several lessons especially meaningful. Here are a few that struck a personal chord and reshaped how I approach conversations and coaching.
The Four Mindsets
Dr. Grant describes four common mindsets we adopt in conversations: the Preacher, the Politician, the Prosecutor, and the Scientist. These archetypes serve as mental modes we slip into—often unconsciously—when presenting or defending our beliefs.
- The Preacher proclaims their views as sacred and unchallengeable.
- The Politician seeks approval, tailoring their message to win support.
- The Prosecutor aims to dismantle opposing arguments to win a debate.
- The Scientist, in contrast, embraces doubt, curiosity, and the willingness to revise their thinking based on new evidence.
This framework hit home for me. In recent conversations, I’ve begun to notice which mindset I bring into the room—especially when I encounter views different from my own. Choosing the Scientist’s mindset, even when it’s difficult, has helped me stay curious, open, and better able to learn from others.
Confident Humility
One of the most powerful concepts I took from the book is “confident humility”—the idea that we can believe in ourselves while staying open to the possibility of being wrong. It’s not about self-doubt; it’s about detaching our opinions from our identity. That distinction was a lightbulb moment for me. Practicing confident humility requires effort, but it’s also a practical and deeply human expression of the virtue of humility. And in the coaching space, it creates room for deeper growth—for both coach and client.
Counterfactual Thinking
Another helpful idea was counterfactual thinking: asking “what if” questions that challenge assumptions and explore alternative possibilities. These questions can gently invite someone to reflect on where their beliefs come from and whether they still serve them. I’ve found this approach especially helpful in understanding others, even when their views don’t change. Sometimes, it’s not about agreement but about truly seeing the other person.
Motivational Interviewing
Motivational Interviewing was new to me, but it immediately resonated. This technique emphasizes humility and curiosity, and centers on three key skills: asking open-ended questions, reflective listening, and affirming the person’s own motivation and ability to change. These are also foundational coaching skills, which makes me even more eager to deepen my knowledge and integrate this method into my practice.
Final Thought
In a world that rewards winning and being right, there’s something quietly radical about slowing down, distinguishing fact from opinions, questioning our own assumptions, and recognizing the possibility that we might be wrong. Rethinking isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of willingness to learn and grow.
